My social battery is drained almost on a daily basis. In fact, my general living battery is constantly requiring a good charge. Maybe a couple of days.
A few of weeks ago, we had a beautiful bank holiday in the UK. The weather wasn’t great (it’s still the UK), but I had a day off of all my responsibilities, just got a pay cheque and felt ready to spend the day shopping like humans do. My mum and I decided to do a little mother-daughter shop in the city centre, something that’s pretty rare for me.
I don’t just avoid the city centre because of anxiety, it’s just busy. I have always struggled with busy and having the patience to deal with busy.
After half an hour in the biggest shopping centre in town, I was already exhausted and we still had a retail park and supermarket to visit. Travelling around, I found myself thinking “I hate this”, “I want to go home”, “there’s people everywhere”, or “I wish I had my book”.
Once I finally returned to the sanctuary that is my home (located in a little village), I started to wonder if I was the only person who thought like this. I didn’t actually talk to that many people, most of them were sales associates, shop assistants and my mum – yet I still found myself wanting to curl up in my room and have some alone time. Was I just having a bad day? Am I just really introverted? Why do I prefer to be alone?
When I think of my friends, I light up with joy. They’re some of my favourite people in the world and they make me happy. We have a ridiculous amount of fun together and I’m always excited to see them. However, at the same time, I’m always equally excited to get home, walk through my bedroom door and just jump into bed. I talk to my friends and family on the daily, maybe I take an hour or two to reply to a text but effort is always made. On some days, the only person I want to talk to is God.
I cherish being alone, in fact I love it. Being social is great for a couple of hours, and I’ll always be grateful for the wonderful group of people I’m able to surround myself with, but I absolutely love being on my own.
When I shoot nature photos, I’m usually on my own. There’s an element of anxiety that comes with it, but that’s what headphones are for. Most of my hobbies are things you do alone. Reading, writing, photography. I’m one of those humans that can go days without physically saying a word and be very happy.
I actually think alone time is really important, and all should take advantage when they can. It allows time for self-analysis, growth and contentment. I think you need to be satisfied and secure in yourself, so you can then help others to find that same kind of security. I would really struggle to find the kind of person I am, or want to be if I didn’t spend a little time alone trying to get there.
One of the main reasons I think I like to treasure my alone time is because it means I can get stuff done. I can girlboss through the day and still have time to hang out with other people. Whenever I have a self-care day, I like to do it alone because I can really focus on myself. I don’t know if that’s super selfish but it’s true!
As I mentioned, I’m an introvert – I enjoy the recharge period after being surrounded by people or in a busy place. I find social interaction quite draining from time to time, but I know it’s got to be done! Alone time is something I look forward to, and will always cherish.